i don't think i can ever be cool/lame (depends on what side of the spectrum you choose to identify with) enough to pull off a starlog a la shatner in the old startrek. i will settle for "scribbling" online with a few confused/unrelated thoughts.
- i'm on spring break! that's thought / fact of reality #1 for the moment right now.
- i need to talk to someone desperately. one person in particular. its supposed to be like a bandaid - you do it in one swift conversation, fully anticipating the excruciating pain that inevitably ensues.
- i need to work on being by myself a little more. not happy enough hanging out with myself these days.. what is the matter with me? i am one the coolest people i know! :) ;)
- i'm trying to get myself pumped with the pussycat dolls' song - "I don't need a man"... sometimes the only way to work up gusto in life is by trashing one entity or another...
- kind of neutrally angry with some of my closest friends right now. hearing the truth from a friend isn't all that its cracked up to be - sometimes its very hard to distinguish between the message and the messenger - right now, i'm kinda not in the mood to talk to any of the messengers.
- call me crazy... (my brother thinks i am obsessed with pride and prejudice, but actually, i just really think that some truly awesome experiences are captured in the book).... but you know when darcy talks to elizabeth right at the end of the book, and he opens his heart to her and you finally understand that despite how his actions seemed, he always loved elizabeth and that he was man enough to accept his mistakes and even more important.. man enough to still want elizabeth.... my heart yearns and desperately desires to feel the exhilaration that i felt for elizabeth when i read that passage.. ... i think i was just amazed that such a man existed! someone who was as smart and intelligent (and yeah.. i'm shallow.. and as loaded!) and who had that awesome an upbringing could fall in love with an upstart of a young woman who gave him nothing but attitude... and that he loved her enough to accept her follies and also accept her criticism of him... and still love her... ....................................................... *sigh*
sorry the writing is crazy.. i'm on edge.. and kind of tired despite not having done a single blessed thing all day... i don't need a man.... more power to the pussycat dolls!!
Mercifully not stranded in the seaward C-word any more!!
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